Hi everyone. Here’s a quick update on the writing side of Candles In the Sun.
I have noticed a marked tendency on my part to make my chapters the exact length that I manage to write that week. Given the crazy weeks that sometimes happen and the need to have some longer chapters, I’ve realized that’s unrealistic.
I wrote a lot this week but the chapter isn’t done. I have a definite end in mind and am writing towards it. So, rather than make each chapter artificially the same length, I had two choices: give you a half chapter or wait. In this case, I’m waiting because the “story arc” demands it.
The idea that I would ever think such a ridiculous notion as a story arc never crossed my mind when I started writing. I guess it is inevitable that I learn such writer-y excuses for not finishing a chapter because it sounds better than blaming it on my dog, Nessie. But it is easier than figuring out how a dog could eat the internet before school.
As always, the truth is shorter but definitely not easier. It is this – half done is not done.
It has been said that all writing is an act of courage. No one mentions that it is usually said by writers the day before a deadline.
They say it because facing your fears is difficult. Whether or not writing rises to the level of courage depends on the size of your fears. In my case, the fear of being publicly exposed here as a sham is far less painful than delving back into these memories. Being honest in front of you is less difficult than being honest before myself.
Reliving memories means second-guessing.
At the moment, I have cleaned up my office of all the yellow post-it notes littering my computer monitor. But there is one that I couldn’t take down. It says FEAR.
It is a reminder that fear is the only thing that stands between me and my goals. If I keep writing, I will finish a book. Whether or not I will have the time to do it is in God’s hands. Whether or not I have the courage to begin again each day is in mine.
I know of no other way to discover your limitations than to reach them while attempting something beyond your capacity. Our abilities grow when we challenge them and we are blessed with expanded limitations.
And there’s only one way to discover where the new boundary lies.
To anyone observing, this looks like a man who is continually failing. And I suppose it is. I prefer to see it as a man who is continually striving to be more than he was the day before.
But I would say that, wouldn’t I?
Because I’m a writer.